Many people have a desire to be successful (whatever that means to the individual) and outwardly state that they believe they deserve that outcome. Yet many will achieve some level of success or achievement only to self-sabotage and stop advancing forward in pursuit of the set goals. What stops people in their tracks? Why do some abandon the path to success and settle for the familiar? It usually can be attributed to negative self talk or “Head Trash.”
Are you a victim of your own “Head Trash” but don’t recognize the negative self-talk that takes over your brain like cancer? I was introduced to the idea of “Head Trash” almost twenty years ago while going through a Sandler Sales Training boot camp. David Sandler nailed the obstacle that most people have in making sales and it’s YOU! In case you were wondering, everybody who is reading this is a Salesperson, we all are. I have run sales teams and have talked to business owners for years and these are what some common internal Head Trash conversations sound like:
- Price and Money Head Trash –
- Our/My prices are too high, no-one will pay that much for this…..
- I can’t ask a potential customer about their budget, that’s rude!
- They probably would not want to buy this? (potential customers definitely won’t buy with that message…)
Much of this comes from how we were raised and the household conversations about money. Some of these conversations are probably good advice for the neighborhood and family but it can become ingrained in our brains and creeps in unnoticed as we set to run our businesses and talk to potential customers. Maybe these conversations sounded a little like this:
- Don’t talk about money with our friends and neighbors, it’s rude! Never ask people how much money they make….
- Don’t get too full of yourself, there are a lot people out there who are good at ………
- The neighbors are starting a new business! Do you know how hard it is to start a business? Most fail in the first year….
How can you stop the Head Trash in its steps! Just STOP. I was reminded of a old Bob Newhart episode where a new patient is telling him about her problems and he says there is a two work solution for the problem. Plain and simple, STOP IT! (Click to watch the video)
It really is that simple but takes twenty-one days to change the habit (Take my “Twenty-One Day Challenge” from a previous post). Anybody can change their mindset on a dime but you have to take action to do it! You may even have to “fake it till you make it” during the twenty-one days but one day you will notice less Head Trash. The truth is even the most disciplined of us fall into these familiar traps as we get stressed or mentally lazy, I will pull up some reading material from Tony Robbins. I recommend the three set series for taking action in life, business and personal relationships. It might have been published a while ago but it is always relevant!
Having a limitimg belief can be very evident on the surface or they can be reflected in unconscious thoughts and actions. They will generally keep someone from attempting something they desire to do or they may just make the person feel too weak and disempowered to try to move ahead. When a belief is limiting or disempowering, it will actually feel like a heavy weight.
My name is Michael, and I read your article about how running an online business is tough.
First of all, I was just curious what were you spending all of your money on? Other than the conferences you attended?
Second, is it better to choose a topic that lots of other people are already in, or something where you have less competition?
Great Questions Michael!
I tend to invest in traffic in different areas (split-testing if you will), I buy targeted direct traffic mainly, some facebook ads occasionally and even google ads. I monitor the results closely and change up the keywords and programs to see what works. Even when a method seems to work, it can change. Monitor the results daily!
Topics with a host of competitors is expensive to advertise in, so what you will see is affiliate marketers advertising around “launches” to catch the increased traffic and interest. Use Jaaxy, it is phenomenal, for keyword searches if you want to develop organic search growth and be patient!
It not so much the conferences but the speakers, if Brendan Burchard, Frank Kern and some others are there, great for networking and advice.
Wow! This is quite awesome to see here. When you have limiting belief, especially without knowing, it might really prove to be a quite herculean task. Thanks for sharing all these here. Left to me, I feel that the best way to overcome self limiting belief is to stay off problems and try to double up efforts towards attaining success. Thanks so much